Hi beautiful mamas!
The good thing is it’s Wednesday, so halfway through the week. Hang in there!So maybe by now you figured out that I like to mix it up a little on the Blog sharing bits and pieces of motherhood along with style. The purpose being to show you that balance is possible.
But anyways, have you heard of the term “ferberizing”? The word itself was news to me, but not the actual definition if that makes sense. Being a mom of three, I am a firm believer that babies can put themselves to bed. I’ll share a bit about my experience with all three of my babies. But, first let’s define “ferberize”. It means laying your baby in bed awake and then leaving the room, allowing the baby to fall asleep on her own. If she cries, you wait to see if it increases before calming her down otherwise, you leave her alone. She will eventually learn to soothe herself to sleep.
So what do you think of that? Is this something you’ve tried?
This approach is effective but not very easy. You often want to pick up your baby when they’re crying, but you shouldn’t. You should pat your baby, and with your touch assuring that you’re there and everything is fine. It’s definitely a progress, takes some time.
I have loved using the Nested Bean sleeping sack for Anastasija. Every night, or every other I give her a warm bath, and then we play for a little until I can see she wants to sleep. I then put her in her sleeping sack, and in her DockATot. The sleeping sack has a pad on the chest area that you place your hand on so it mimics your touch for baby to fall asleep. You can read all about my review here. That’s how I leave Anastasija in her crib and she falls asleep.
But let’s rewind back four years, to when my first-born Vasilije arrived. Among many many new mom things, sleeping was completely off for both of us. Long story short, I used to hold him and sing to him until he falls asleep. He wouldn’t fall asleep on his own in his crib. I couldn’t let him “cry it out”, and would pick him up everytime. I mean, he didn’t give us a lot of trouble once he was asleep but having to cradle him for his nap and for bedtime was exhausting! It became a routine, in order for him to fall asleep I’d change him, feed him and then hold him, cradle him and sing so he eventually would fall asleep. And sometimes, that would mean 20-30 mins. It was a lot on me to do, and it wasn’t something I wanted to do all the time.
So, with my second I decided so change things knowing that it may not be easy. But, I set my mind to it. I didn’t know I was in for a surprise with Mateja. He, on the other hand loved sleeping in his crib and soothing himself to sleep. He’d fuss a bit here and there but would end up falling asleep. I always checked on him to make sure he was ok, and covered him. But, never had to cradle him, or hold him to fall asleep.
And, don’t get me wrong I LOVE to play, cuddle, sing, read books etc., with my babies but do not like the idea of them being dependant on me holding them to fall asleep. At the same time, I would never let my baby cry uncontrollably for a long period of time either. There is balance, and it’s a progress not an overnight thing.
I should also say that I am not opposed to other approaches, or co-sleeping. Everyone does what works for them, and fits their family. This works for us.
I know that this approach is not for everyone, and although some parents swear by it others criticize it. So, I am curious are you more of a “ferberizing” or “no tears” approach parent?
xoxo,
Vesna
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